Netflix Shows - My Super-Sensitive 3 year's Favorite

"Deep in the hundred Acre Wood, where Christopher Robin Plays,
You'll find the enchanted neighbourhood, of Christophers Childhood Days!"

Underneath a beautiful "Apple Sauce" sky, there was a green carpet. It was skillfully decorated with flowers and butterflies and there started the story with "Once Upon a Time..." Yes, that's how "Pooh's Hefallump Movie" started. My three-year-old daughter was sitting silently with me and her Dad. I somehow managed to convince her to stop watching her favorite "Wheels on the bus goes round and round..." and give the movie a try. It started with a background narration and the beautiful wood, sunshine, birds and how everyone was happy like "Tumbly full of Honey". Then the background voice goes Deeper to describe how everything got changed when "The Stranger Came" and there was a backdrop Trumpet sound. My daughter shudder "what's that?" she asked with an alarm. I told her "Its nothing, it's an Elephant". She moved closer to me. The movie continued with cute Pooh sleeping and again another Trumpet which startled sleeping Pooh and my wide-awake daughter equally. We had to turn it off in 4 minutes when my daughter started crying shutting her eyes and ears. 

My daughter spends her whole day in a school. After coming back home in the evening, she eats her dinner and then after some play- study-color sessions, she takes her bath. Next, she gets her screen time. She watches her regular "ABCD" songs while we finish our dinner. She always favors her nursery rhymes and I am so tired listening to the same songs for years. I wanted to introduce some new shows, but nothing works out since she is too frightened watching those alone or even with us. So, her Netflix shows are restricted to only those which "makes Oli laugh laugh" (Oli is my daughter's nickname).

So, here goes my super-sensitive daughter's favorite shows on Netflix for 2-3 years of age group:

1. Little Baby Bum:
Little Baby Bum (also known as LBB) is a Youtube channel for kids of lower age group. This channel portrays the traditional nursery rhymes in 3D animation videos which are very colorful and entertaining. 

2. HooplaKidz:
HooplaKidz is another YouTube series and an educational website for pre-school kids. In Netflix, this show has only 1 Episode and we watched it again and again.

3. Mother Goose Club:
Mother Goose Club is the first show she started watching in Netflix which involves some humans, though the songs are the same old Nursery Rhymes. The kids sing and dance with the old nursery rhymes and my daughter also stands up and tries to imitate the big kids. She looks at them as her role model, surprised by their dancing skills and how beautifully they sing.In Netflix, there are only 2 Seasons and we have watched it several times.

4. Word Party:
Word Party is Netflix Original and the 3rd Season is added recently. It stars four young animals, "Kip" a Wallaby, "Bailey" an Elephant, "Franny" a Cheetah, and "Lulu" a Panda. The songs are super catchy and my daughter just giggles and dance when they are having a "Word Party" after they learn some new words. There is a Tickety Clock which tells what time it is and the adorable kids act accordingly. They just love to sing, dance and play. There is no adventure or anything scary and loved by my daughter.

4. Sarah and Duck:
Sarah and Duck is the adventures of Sarah, a little girl with a green hat and her best friend Duck. There is a background voice which narrates the story, talks to Sarah and her Duck. The adventures are fun and not at all scary. There is 2 Season in Netflix. I too like watching the small episodes and can't stop myself from giggling.  

5. The Very Hungry Caterpillar and Other Stories:
This series is just like the Book by Eric Carle. The first story is about a green baby caterpillar which hatches from an egg. He is very hungry and eats a huge quantity of food. He does not feel well. So he spins a cocoon in which he remains for the following two weeks. Later, the caterpillar emerges as a bright and beautiful butterfly which looks just gorgeous. The series looks quite different from the other shows. It is like a beautiful painting. I was not expecting my daughter to like it. But, she liked it somehow and was quite worried about the green little caterpillar. 

6. Pocoyo:
This small episode animated series is recently added to my daughter's watchlist. The main character of this series is a small boy "Pocoyo" who wears blue clothes. He is accompanied by a pink elephant "Elly", a yellow duck named "Pato" and a "Loula" a puppy. There is a background narration voice which speaks over the entire show. The stories are all about their day-to-day life and how things are going on with or around the super energetic Pocoyo.

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#MeToo - My tiny contribution to a bigger cause

I saw a post on Facebook which states "#MeToo... Several Times". I was confused. What is that all about? I ignored and I forgot about it. A few hours later, I saw another post with the MeToo hashtag. I did a little google and got some idea. I thought for a moment: "Should I or I should not?" I decided on negative. I decided to do nothing. I have more than 300 friends on Facebook and I saw the Hashtag only 5times, till now. So, I guess, all of my friends think alike!But what are we thinking?

I assume #MeToo is a movement to understand the magnitude of sexual assault or violence. But, wait! What the Data says here? Only 5 out of 330 of my friends have voiced their concern which is just 1.5%. So, how are we going to infer on the degree of this problem when we do not have the real data?

I was born and brought up in a small industrial town in India, in a middle-class family. Most of the time I was accompanied either by my mom or my dad or my sister. Still, I have experienced Fear, Embarrassment, and Anxiety. I did not know about sexual harassment. I just knew that I was encountering that behavior since I was a GIRL. Oh Okay! Now, I have learned that even MEN can be a victim of Sexual Violence. But, as per my culture, my upbringing and my life, I have never seen a guy getting a crude comment on the road or getting elbowed in a bus. So yes, all my views and perceptions are based on a small-town girl who has lived through this.

The town, where I was brought up, is SAFE for women. There are no incidents of sexual violence, at least nothing that we are aware of. We never stayed out at night. There was no scope either. But there was the culture of guys assembling in a club or by the side of the road for chit-chats, infamously called "ADDA". There were different 'Addas' for different age group and different sets of people, at different places. Even, the purpose is different. I have always seen those "Addas" as the gathering for the street-side-Romeos. They sit there to tease passing girls with their comments, whistles and gawk. I remember, how I used to stop breathing for those few seconds if I had to pass by a "Romeo" group. I hoped that if I could stop my breath for a few seconds, I could let those stare and comments pass by. But how stupid an act was that? Do you call that a Sexual Harassment? I did not know! Still, I am not sure. And, I bet many of my friends still don't consider that as a Sexual Harassment and that's why no #MeToo.

When I completed my school, I moved to Kolkata for my college. The first time, I was all alone in the city. I was the shy girl from a small town. I have stayed at a paying guest and also in a hostel. I have traveled alone. I studied in an Engineering college where girls: boys ratio was 1:10.I have lived through the sexual assault everywhere and every day. I have experienced men of all age hovering on me on a crowded bus. I never understood what a perverted pleasure a man gets feeling hard in a bus full of unknown people and letting a girl know that she is the reason. I have felt anger, humility every day. I had planned on raising my voice. But most of the times, I couldn't. I got down before my stop and rode another bus and bought another ticket. I walked to my stop, many times. I was ashamed to talk about it. I was embarrassed to make a scene out of it. I practiced many times to protest. But, on the crime scene, I was silent. I knew it was not my fault. But, I was never taught to stand for myself. Do you call that a Sexual Assault? I did not know! Still, I am not sure. And, I bet many of my friends still don't consider that as a Sexual Assault and that's why no #MeToo.

I completed my degree and started working. I promoted myself to a taxi or an auto since I was getting a good amount of salary. But, that heinous act did not stop. I was still a commodity to stare at. I still heard nasty comments. I was still touched. I learned that a man's distorted behavior does not depend on age or education or the dress a girl is wearing. It's an illness and it can infect anyone. The guy who was trying to touch my boobs in an auto, hiding his hand under his bag, worked in the same MNC where I worked. I tagged that man as ILL. I took a rickshaw to my home from a nearby railway station on a sunny day. I got down at my home and took out my purse to pay that above 50-year-old man. "Your pant Zip is open" the man commented with an evil smile on his face and pointing out a finger. I was flustered. I did not know how to react. My ears turned red in pain and mortification and anger. I threw the money at him and ran inside. Even, After 15 years of that incident and 12,601KM away, I am struggling while writing it down. Still, I don't understand what sadistic pleasure he got with that comment. Guess what, I was wearing a salwar suit that day. Do you consider all these incidents as Sexual Harassment? I did not know. Still, I don't understand and sadly that's why a no #MeToo.

Today, I do not travel in a public transport. I am married. I stay in United States where I drive. I do not encounter a harassment in my daily life. But I am a mom of a Girl and I know it is my responsibility to protect my child. I know, I can't be with her every time she hears a sexual comment. She will have to win her own battle and figure out a way that suits her nature, her judgment. What I can do as a mother? I will tell her "You are not supposed to encounter any sexual harassment since you are a Girl!"  I will teach her not to run away. I will make her believe that she should never be ashamed of an act of some other person who is sick.

I too dream of a world without a Metoo hashtag. But the reality is, it's just an ideal world and far far away. Instead, we can concentrate on preparing our girls to fight for it and our boys fight too for the same cause! Stop this Pink and Blue distinction! Put an end to this Car and Doll differences! Raise them with same values and love them equally and just as a "Home Sapiens".

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Pink or Blue - Which color are you?

I went to a neighborhood park with my daughter. She was insisting on me riding the slide, while she would wait on the bench. I was trying to convince her that it should be the other way around. During our heated discussion, a man walked in with a cute baby in a stroller.

I whispered to my daughter "Look, a Baby!" 

My daughter, on top of her voice: "Baby, Where?" and then on noticing the man and the baby, she added: "Ohhhhhhhhh!"

The man smiled and I asked casually "a girl or a boy?"

He looked offended and snapped "Hey, look he is wearing blue! Obviously, he is a boy!" 

I was embarrassed. In that few seconds, I didn't notice what the baby was wearing. I flashed my apologetic smile and asked: "How old is he?" He replied sternly, "Almost a month now!" I beamed and took my daughter to the slide. The conversation ended in a few seconds but a thought lingered in my mind: "Why is it so obvious?" 

That's a girl and she is wearing Blue!

I  never noticed this color discrimination until my daughter was born. My childhood was colorful like a rainbow. I wore all the colors and I love Colors. I never knew that a girl has to like shades of pink and a boy means blue. There were no branded stores or media to put that idea in my mind. But when my daughter was born, I stepped into a popular branded baby store and I was surprised. The shop was divided into three sections - pink on one side, blue on the other side and a few white and yellow in the center. The soft shades of pink and blue looked exquisite. But, "Where are all the colors?" I wondered. 

Now, my daughter is three years old. I see pink everywhere - her clothes, jackets, shoes, bag, her tricycle, her car everything is either pink or purple. Even, she had asked for a pink cake on her Birthday. How did that happen? I didn't plan for this.I am just a victim of the color-gender pairing that is dominating the market and even people's mind. I bought so many blue rompers for her when she was a baby. I had to pick that from the boy's section.  I used to look for any color other than Pink. If it is Blue, so be it. I wonder, what she would have told me if she could speak at that age!

"Mamma, I am a GIRL and I like Pink"

My choices are limited now. Besides, I can no more pick from the boy's rack. Most importantly, I have to dress up my daughter for school every morning. So, I try to play it safe and do not experiment much with her dress when she believes Pink is her favorite color. A three-year-old's judgment is clouded and I will try to help her see through it. But what about those parents, who believe that too much of pink can change a boy's sexual orientation. Honestly, I have never seen a baby boy dressed in a pink suit. If you see a baby wrapped in a soft cuddly pink blanket, what would be your guess about that baby's gender? How would you react if your son declares his favorite color is Pink?
I am worried how deep it is routed. How would parents let their child make their own choices when they are biased? How would a child express his/her likes and dislikes if those are not approved by their own parents?

I don't see a reason behind this gender stereotyping. I like Pink! But I like a Blue too. I do wear Blue all the time. And I believe most of the women wear different shades of blue. But I hardly see men wearing a nice pastel shade of Pink. Even, I have never gifted my husband a pink shirt, nor my dad. What's wrong with us? How can a man's manhood be challenged, just wearing a color? It's core inside the man and it can't be dictated by the color they wear or the car they drive or the sports they watch or the drink they prefer.

So, wake up moms! Dress your girl in a blue shirt with a cute little dinosaur or a car. You don't have to buy the princess diaper every time. Let her explore the car diaper, it is equally effective. And for the boys' mamma, it is okay if your boy does like Pink or a fairy. The last thing that you can buy in a store is a man's manhood! So, Why do you bother?

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Potty Train a Toddler

"Congratulations! Shreyanvi is now potty trained and is eligible to get promoted to the preschool."

The week before my daughter's 3rd birthday, her class teacher handed me the above note. I smiled nervously "Really? Is she?"

I read lots of articles and blogs on how to start or when to start and how to practice potty training. I think each and every parent takes an approach that suits them best. Our strategy was a simple  "Wait until she is ready".  We could not try the steps of 5 days plans to potty training. We could not keep her diaper free because:

• On weekdays, she goes to a daycare and she has to wear a diaper until they confirm that she is ready 
• On weekends, we spend most of the time outside home and we could not take the risk

So, we took up a stress-free plan that suits our terms. We didn't rush her or us. So, here is my Steps to Potty Training:

Step-1: Switch to pull-ups: 
Once she turned 2 years, we switched to pull-ups from the regular diapers. She gradually learned to pull it down or pull it up like an underwear. She liked to pick her own design - a princess,  a car or a lion. 

Step-2: Potty Training Seat:
We bought a potty training chair before she turned 2. However, we never used it. I was not sure if she gets used to that chair, how would I practice her to seat in a regular toilet. It is not so convenient to carry it every time we leave home!

One day, I tried to take her to a regular toilet and she was scared that she would fall. She was nervous, she screamed and it looked fair! So, we decided that first, we need to make sure that she can sit comfortably. We got a potty training seat. It fits perfectly in the regular toilet and thus she can sit easily without the fear of slipping in. She didn't complain and got comfortable sitting there on her own.

Step-3: Regular visits to the toilet:
We started taking her to the toilet after she comes back home from her daycare. We made her sit there whether she peed or not. She sings her rhymes, tells her ABCs and 1-2-3 and we just wait there patiently. If she pees, we do high-fives and claps. Till now, we do the same. In the meantime, she started sitting on the toilet in her daycare and she got used to the concept and understood that it is a part n parcel of growing up. She was excited that she was not treated like a baby anymore and she is a "Big Girl"!

Step4: Underwear and No diapers:
When she was around 2 and a half years old, I bought a pack of underwears for her. She was super excited that she got to wear "pantoos" (yes, that's what she calls her underwears) like big girls. She was adaptive and willing to the concept of going diaper-free. On weekends, we started to put her without a diaper at home. But, while going out, we used a diaper. Sometimes, she used to tell us before a pee. But few other times, accidents happened. It felt like 'We were almost there, but not totally there'. 

Step5: Trust your kid:
We spend a lot of hours outdoors on weekends and I am always scared of using a public toilet. It is not always clean. I was looking for some ways to keep her diaper free, even if we are out. I saw some disposable potty seat covers in Amazon and I ordered. It looked amazing and safe, but expensive. I have to take her 4-5 times to a toilet and it seemed not-so-convenient. I started checking out again and the next idea I got was disinfecting wipes. We kept a bottle in each car and one in my bag while traveling and it worked pretty well. It fits my budget, easy to use and most importantly keep me worry-free. 

Then, one day, in her daycare, her teacher told that we can send her without a diaper. She spends most of her time, when she is awake, in a daycare. Unless they encourage her to stay without a diaper, she cannot be totally ready. I was waiting for this green signal for long. Then, after a few days, her class teacher handed me the note that "She is Ready."

Even, today morning, I repeated to her like a mantra "No pee or poo in an underwear". She understands, she repeats and until now, we are doing good. I am not worried anymore. We have come a long way without much efforts and I am confident that we will be reaching that goal soon enough. If an accident happens, I am prepared. 
I carry an extra pair of cloth.
I carry my disinfecting wipes.
I take her to toilets every two hours or when she asks for it.

So, to all the parents out there who are planning to start a potty training program for their kids or who are already in it "Just be patient and pick up your own pace!" Somewhere I read that "No child ever went to her proms wearing a diaper" and it is so true!!!

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How to stop bottle feeding in toddlers?

My daughter turned three on 3rd of October.  It was a busy fun-filled foody week. A friend with his family was visiting us. Their one-and-a-half-year-old son reminded me of my daughter at that age.  He was full of energy, dancing and jumping around. But when it comes to food, he just shut his mouth off. Playing some video can distract him for some time when his mom pushes a few spoons of food into his mouth.  But, after some time, he is hungry and cries for his bottle and milk. Even, at night, he wakes up multiple times for milk.

Watching them, I was wondering how the story repeats at every house! My daughter was really addicted to milk in her bottle. She used to wake up at night every two-three hours and I always questioned when I would get my sleep back. She needed her bottle to get back to sleep. 

When she turned one, her doctor suggested to stop using a bottle. It was tough! She didn't eat much and whenever she was hungry she used to ask for milk. I tried a straw cup. But she didn't like it. She cried her heart out every time. I complied after some time, thinking that she might be really hungry and would give it a try the next time! Well, you know, the next time didn't arrive for another 6 months.  

Then, one fine morning, I woke up determined and took all her bottles and put those in the trash. That’s It! It was that easy!
The next course of events was as expected. She didn't eat much. She asked for milk. The milk arrived in a straw cup. She asked for her bottle. I told her that I was not able to find any of her bottles. She searched. She cried. She didn't drink her milk. She got hungry. She ate some food instead. 

That night was difficult. She cried for milk. I and my husband took turns to soothe her. She was not able to get back to sleep and was irritated. She screamed, She yelled and at one point, I questioned my judgment. I thought I should not have thrown her bottles away. After crying for a few hours(That's right!), she got tired and she slept. We were terrified for the next night. 

Next night, she wept for some time and then she slept and it was not that bad. Well, it took her 3-4 days to realize that she won't get her bottle how much she cries. After, a few nights, she started sleeping 5-6 hours at a stretch. In the middle, if she woke up and cried for milk, I had just given her some water in her straw cup.

For a kid, it is easy and convenient to drink some milk and stay full. They tend to avoid eating and chewing because, you know, it's a lot of work! Moreover, they know if they cry for some time they can get their way out! They are pretty smart! Kids, like us, have a sleep-wake cycle at night.  For adults, we can get back to sleep without any aid. But, for kids, they need to learn that skill. Usually, they rely on feeding or sucking to get back to sleep. That's why they cry for a bottle. We sometimes have mistaken it for hunger. Believe me, they are not crying for milk because they are hungry.Even, milk at night can cause tooth decay.  And more milk they drink, less food they will eat. 

So, how to get your toddler give up a bottle? It's simple! Give up your weakness. Throw away all the bottles, so that you won't give up when you kid screams for his/her bottle. Well, that is my reality. It took us a few nights to get rid of bottles. But, it worked like a magic! Now, my daughter drinks her milk in a normal open cup with a straw; And on some days, she holds a cup in her tiny hands and drinks right away.

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